The Long, Sad Saga of Not Playing KOTOR (2009)

The Long, Sad Saga of Not Playing KOTOR

Tagged As:

folk cheese geekery starwars jedipop

Liner Notes:

A couple of days before FAWM 2009, I got a really bad cold, and wanted to do nothing but curl up with blankets and soup and KOTOR. Really, really craving a good game of Pazaak, some ship-to-ship fights... Star Wars sound effects... blaster and lightsaber battles...

Lyrics:

Going to play KOTOR and going to play with blasters, oooh
Going to play KOTOR and going to play with lightsabers too
Gee this is really crashing and giving weird errors
What the hell is going on?

I found the discs and couldn't find the serial
Couldn't find the serial
Couldn't find the serial
For the life of me

I finally realized that KOTOR doesn't have one
KOTOR doesn't have one
KOTOR doesn't have one
Gosh I feel silly

Going to play KOTOR and going to play with blasters, oooh
Going to play KOTOR and going to play with lightsabers too
Gee this is really crashing and the videos are half untextured
What the hell is going on?

I thought it was my DVD drive going all to hell
But then I found the error of my ways
KOTOR was coded in the golden olden days
Long before dual cpu - and we've got quadcores now!

My ancient dinosoar, still won't play my KOTOR
Because my computer's got two cores

So to avoid all the hassle, I uninstalled
And went to install on the laptop
Which is even older and has only one processor

Going to play KOTOR and going to play with blasters, oooh
Going to play KOTOR and going to play with lightsabers too -
But the second install disc is corrupt!
SINCE I INSTALLED IT LAST NIGHT!

WTF WTF WTF!
WTF WTF WTF!

I already uninstalled it from the desktop
So I couldn't just copy the files over and edit the registry
And my friend who also owns it was babysitting and couldn't bring it over
So now, to play my game
I've got to PIRATE A GAME I ALREADY BOUGHT!
I'm going to PIRATE A GAME I ALREADY BOUGHT!

Going to play KOTOR and going to play with blasters, oooh
Going to play KOTOR and going to play with lightsabers too
Going to play KOTOR and going to play with blasters, oooh
Going to play KOTOR WOOOHOOOO!